Who You'd Be Today
by AngelOfDarkness352
Summary: Edward never returns and Bella unfortuantly passes away. Edward's last thoughts on his angel in her casket. A songfic by Kenny Chesney.


Who You'd Be Today

Song: Who You'd Be Today

By: Kenny Chesney

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_Sunny days seem to hurt the most,_

_I wear the pain like a heavy coat,_

It was surprisingly sunny outside. Most would think it was a great day for a funeral. Well, it wasn't for me. For me it seemed like the sun was covered up behind the dark gray clouds, filling up the sky with depression and angst. But the sky didn't hold a single interest for me as I stared down at the beautiful dead corpse below.

_I feel you everywhere I go,__  
__I see your smile, I see your face,_

_I hear you laughing in the rain,_

I remembered her laugh. It sounded like bells, soft and light. Oh, and her eyes. Those irresistible eyes. The eyes that made me melt, the eyes that were now closed. I was tempted to raise open her eyelids, but I didn't want to mess up her peaceful face.

_I still can't believe you're gone,_

I felt my chest tear open at the thought of her gone, never being able to hear her laugh, never to see her smile. The thought was too much to bear. I knew I wouldn't be able to live like this for much longer.

_It ain't fair you died too young, _

_Like a story that had just begun,_

_The death tore the pages all away,_

She had died too young. She was only thirty-six. Cancer was a terrible thing, but that's not really how she died. She refused to get treatment, and her neighbors often saw her cutting herself. They say she was very depressed. I can only guess why.

_God knows how I miss you,_

_All the hell that I've been through,_

_Just knowing no one could take your place,_

I should never have left her. That one sentence has haunted me for many years. I miss her so terribly. I remember when I got that dreaded phone call from Alice, telling me the news. I never would've thought she'd be gone. I'd always imagined her to live forever. I've been through so much, when thought I left her behind I thought that she would eventually start a new life. Boy was I wrong. All those years and all she did was stay home, locked inside.

_Sometimes I wonder,_

_Who you'd be today_

Well, hopefully she had found Charlie in heaven and they would live happily ever after up in heaven. Poor Charlie got killed by a drunk driver, I learned a couple days ago. I knew the town of Forks would be angry with me for leaving, so I decided to come two days before the funeral. I was luckily all alone with my angel.

_Would you see the world?_

_Would you chase your dreams?_

_Settle down with a family?_

_I wonder, what would you name your babies?_

Bella should have moved on. I know I never did, but I at least have all eternity. My mind started wondering on how moving on would have affected her life. Would she have traveled or become a mom? Would she marry? What would she name her children if she had any?

_Some day's the sky's so blue,_

_I feel like I can talk to you,_

_I know it might sound crazy_

I wonder how often she thought of me. Maybe as much as I did her. I couldn't even go outside to hunt, because every time I go out into the sunlight it reminds me of her. It's like the wind calls her name, taunting me. I must have been going crazy.

_It ain't fair you died too young, _

_Like a story that had just begun,_

_The death tore the pages all away_

_God knows how I miss you,_

_All the hell that I've been through,_

_Just knowing no one could take place_

_Sometimes I wonder,_

_Who you'd be today_

By this time I was dry sobbing. I knew I couldn't really cry, but I wish with all my heart that I could.

_Sunny days seem to hurt the most  
I wear the pain like a heavy coat  
The only thing that gives me hope  
Is I know I'll see you again someday_

She looked beautiful in her casket. Her long brown hair swirled around her neck and face. She had no make-up on, and her skin was even paler, if that was possible. Her lips were a bit rosy, and the sides of her mouth were pulled up in a smile. She had wanted to die. It made sense, I mean why else would you want to go through with the pain of cancer and not get treated?

_Someday, Someday_

Someday I was going to see her again.

I promised myself I wouldn't touch her, but how could I not?

I leaned down and gently kissed her on the forehead, then turned around and walked away, noticing that the sky was a perfect, clear blue.

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A/N- So how was it? I thought of this when I was listening to Kenny Chesney on my iPod.

Review away!


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